Friday, April 01, 2005

i kissed boredom goodbye

the past week was just uneventful for me. too uneventful perhaps. doing nothing absolutely kills me! exaj naman yon. i'm not yet suicidal. but it depressed me to the point that i'm super quiet (which is way out of my character) and my parents worry about me.

i don't know why i'm like that... maybe because:

1. i'm used to doing two or three things at the same time (during school)
2. i'm so used to having gerald around and i miss him terribly
3. my dad's not here and the house seems so quiet without his ka-cornihan and kalokohan
4. i'm just too pissed why the unfortunate circumstances wouldn't allow me to have fun in boracay, or anywhere else for that matter

and so i moped and moped and moped and grumbled and bitched at my brother (which i think he deserves because he kept on annoying me!!!) i think i bit. and growled. and roared. monster mode-ON.

haaaaayy...

anyway, i'm glad it's over. after some "therapy", hehehehe, i realized that i have more worth than what i was feeling. i am not a bitchy person. i'm not ugly (yes i felt ugly because i was too tamad to comb and my lips were cracking). i am not mentally stagnating! and the worst: my cynicism blinded me. i felt unloved, unappreciated when in fact i have lots of people who care for me.

nobody can help me. well, except me.

yesterday, my mom finally asked me why i'm so quiet. i told her i was bored. immediately she told me that we would inquire aboout some lessons that i could take over the summer. see. i have all the love and support i can get. :)

several activities came into my mind including: volleyball clinic, badminton clinic, swimming, baking lessons, foreign laguage lessons (yes i can't get enough of studying! =p), piano lessons, art lessons, going to the gym. of course i couldn't do everything i want! after asking around... tadaaa! my summer plans:

april 1-3: kythe foundation's summer camp
a summer camp for kids who have cancer. ge invited me. we're off to national high school for the arts in makiling, laguna later. kaya i better sleep na. :)

electric guitar lessons! basta, 12 sessions, 2 hours per session. no definite date yet... ASAP basta. omg i'm gonna be a rocker chick! hehehe. :D

apr 18-24: art lessons (oil pastel)
apr 25-30 : art lessons (cartooning)
supposedly, the art lessons were for 6-12 year olds only. and i'm like 7 or more years older than them! kahit pa. hehehe. okay lang. :)

dates in between: the gym, going out with gerald, going out with my barkada, going to lb, etc.

for may... i dunno. i'm still thinking. baking lessons siguro. kasi by then, i have "funding" na. hehehe. or maybe formal driving lessons. but i can drive well na eh, i think. i just don't know why my mom holds on to her seat too tightly! ahahahahahaha!

i have many things to look forward to. happiness. i actually have something to do.

No comments: